That girl from NaNoWriMo has interesting taste.

This strange November has compelled me to do even stranger things.  One example would be the writing of a 50,000 word novel in just 30 days.  Another example is the takeover of my brain by my main character. 

Being that she's in a desperate situation with no options other than to fend for herself, she has discovered that her survival depends completely on her ability to be resourceful.  There are very few food items that she's been able to find, and during the course of the story she has put these ingredients together to make unique meals to get her through the ordeal.  To give you an idea of how far cuisine has devolved, here's how one of her experiences reads in the story.

I already loaded up my mom’s car with all of the soda that’s left, along with a tub full of a new recipe that I invented.  Check it out:

Chocolate Survival Pudding

Ingredients:

• One box of Triple Chunk brownie mix
• Half of a can of Diet Coke

Directions:

Empty brownie mix into bowl.  Add half of a can of soda to mix.  Stir until gloopy.  Don’t wait on it to set, because it won’t.

Assessment of the recipe: Very sweet with a mild chemical aftertaste.  Biting into the occasional chunk of chocolate elicits feelings of general happiness.  Despite the initial grainy texture, the dish goes down smooth.  Final judgment: Not steak and potatoes, but considering the circumstances, just as satisfying.

According to the side of the box there are 2100 calories in this bowl, mostly from sugar.  In the last two days I’ve had about 100 calories, all from an apple.  I’ll post this recipe to Food.com after all of this insanity is over and let the trolls in the comments section decide whether it’s more fashionable to suffer from starvation or from diabetic shock.

She loves telling me her story.  In fact, she talks so much, I find myself making notes all day: on receipts in my wallet, on my leg as I drive, on the back of the checkbook as I pay bills.  Today she spoke to me a little differently.  As I was trying to describe this concoction on the page, she said,

"You really should try it."

"No way," I replied.  "That's disgusting."

"Come on, you wuss," she said.  "The stuff saved my life.  The least you could do is give it a little taste."

"No!" I screamed as I slammed the laptop shut. 

The phone rang a few minutes later and our vet asked me to come out and pick up the dog's medicine.  While driving there I passed Winn-Dixie and suddenly felt my car turning into the parking lot.  Before long I was in the self-checkout line with a box of brownie mix and a bottle of Diet Coke, and fifteen minutes later,

this was on my countertop.

Yeah, I tasted it.  I got through an entire two spoonfuls before throwing the whole revolting thing in the trash.  It was nowhere close to the warmth and comfort of Sarah's Butterbeer recipe, but it did allow me to create a much more accurate description in the story. 

"Now that wasn't so bad, was it?" she asked.

"You know," I said, "I still have the power to change this outline and kill you off."

"You may think so," she said, and laughed the maniacal laughter of one who has been through hell and barely scraped her way back.

It's only Day 6, friends.  Only Day 6.

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#NaNoWriMo word count so far: 12,944
#NaNoWriMo words to go FOR THE WIN: 37,056

Mood: Disgusted.